How does life look like after we are forgiven? Is it all holiness and close communion with God–a straight, upward-leading road in which we go from glory to glory without experiencing a single fall?
In my walk with God, I’ve had to learn humility. Surrendering my idols and giving up my dark addictions is a struggle I come face to face with daily–and though God has worked in me and made many improvements, I still sometimes fail, and fail disastrously too. Yes, I love God, and want to do good and be good, but I kept failing. I kept questioning myself: whether I really was sincere, whether I really loved God, whether I even wanted God bad enough.
These same questions are echoed in Pastor Matthew Gamble called REBOOT. It is a study on walking closer with God. One of the chapters deals with recovery, and I was floored when I learned that my struggle with my past is not unique. We all live the same struggle with different addictions. I would like to share one of the quotes I read there:
We all swim in an ocean of grace. the church cannot afford to call sin by its true name without calling grace by its true name…. God’s grace asks us to give up our addictions. Augustine once said that God is always trying to give good thigns to us, but our hands are too full to receive them…. On our journey to freedom God jealously guards our dignity. He knows well that addicts are crippled by fear and shame. He lets us make our own decisions even when He would much rather do it for us. But if we hurt ourselves again, He will be there for us –Miroslav Kis
Grasp the hand of our loving Jesus. If you have fallen he wants nothing more than to picke you up and take you in his arms–do the hard work for you. Let us surrender ourselves to him, and let our bodies, our minds, our desires, and all that makes us who we are drown in the ocean of his grace.
Matthew Gamble, Reboot. iFollow Discipleship Series
Miroslav Kis, Adventist Review, July 31 2003, p.4